Queen crest Queenzone

Fatty's Freddie Diaries....

5 posts
Thread

Posts in chronological order

Search forum
Fatty, is there any chance of releasing an updated version of your fabulous Freddie Diaries?

Just re-read this old thread from way back

http://www.queenzone.com/queen/forum/topic_view.asp?Q_FORUM_ID=1&Q_FORUM_NAME=Queen+%2D+Serious+Discussion&Q_FORUM_TOPIC_ID=345080&TOPIC_SUBJECT=The+Private+%26+Personal+Diaries+of+Freddie+Mercury+%281946%2D1991%29&page=1

Which was inspired by this old thread if mine

http://www.queenzone.com/queen/forum/topic_view.asp?Q_FORUM_ID=1&Q_FORUM_NAME=Queen+%2D+Serious+Discussion&Q_FORUM_TOPIC_ID=342947&TOPIC_SUBJECT=A+Question+About+Freddie+To+Get+You+Thinking
"Normally i can't dance to save my life. But as soon as I step in dog shit, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson."
Dont think Fatty reads threads much anymore :(

Oh well.....
"Normally i can't dance to save my life. But as soon as I step in dog shit, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson."
Wednesday 24th July 2007

Today I descended from heaven above and paid a visit to that overweight Scottish waste of space who delights in faking diary entries of mine. I told him in no uncertain terms that if he writes any more of that pathetic drivel I will be forced to put my ethereal shoe up his arse.

Fatty told me not to worry as he was far too busy to make up stories about me as he was putting the finishing touches to his next book which is scheduled to be published this coming October. I have to admit that I was a little surprised that fatty was being allowed to write a fourth book as his last effort “The Hoor-Maister’s Handbook had gone down like a Brazilian tourist on the London underground and when I mentioned this to fatty he began to cry like a little girl. But he assured me that this book was going to be different. “It’s called Baminals” said fatty “And it’s basically a collection of drawings of fictional animals with names that are common Scottish slang expressions such as the numpty, the radge, the ding’ul, the dumplin, the clart, the hun and the tim.
When I asked fatty if this was anything more than an attempt to piggy back on the success of the Ricky Gervais “Flanimals” books he looked sheepish and tried to change the subject.

I then asked if his book might make an excellent Christmas gift for a friend or relative and fatty assured me that anyone waking up on Christmas morning to find a copy of “Baminals” (H/B £9.99 from Black and White publishing due in October) in their stocking would almost certainly be so thrilled that they would probably rush out and buy you an outrageously expensive gift in return or might even agree to have sex with you.

Having seen the final draft of “Baminals” (H/B £9.99 from Black and White publishing due in October) with my own eyes I would tend to agree with him and can’t help but think that if enough of my fans went out and bought a copy it would make me record more songs.

F.M
I think you forgot a few ©s and ®s there, fatty. You should be careful, or your own agent might sue your privates off. Come to think of it, that WOULD be a tremendous amount of free publicity...
Not Plutus but Apollo rules Parnassus
Well Im shocked that Freddie would want to partake in a bout of violence with our Fatty. So sad.... however I am more than pleased to see our Fatty has a new book coming out called “Baminals” (H/B £9.99 from Black and White publishing due in October).

Cant wait!!!

Might as well plug Fatty's other books too

"A Smack In The Pus"

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Smack-Pus-Mercat-Scott-Simpson/dp/1845020669/ref=sr_1_1/203-3438437-8045543?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1185452899&sr=1-1

"Shut Yer Pus"

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Shut-Yer-Pus-Scots-Slang/dp/1845020367/ref=sr_1_2/203-3438437-8045543?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1185452899&sr=1-2

and finally

"The Hoormaister's Handbook"

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Hoormaisters-Handbook-Scott-Simpson/dp/1845021231/ref=sr_1_3/203-3438437-8045543?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1185452899&sr=1-3

Hows that for a plug Fatty?
"Normally i can't dance to save my life. But as soon as I step in dog shit, I can moonwalk better than Michael Jackson."

Sign in to reply