Jake: Can I give you a bit of advice?

If you pretend to be a little girl in order to engage someone in sexual conversations, it is still considered to be "grooming" and could get you into a lot of trouble. Don't do it again!

fatty.

fatty,

Haven't you watched Dateline NBC with Chris Matthews yet?

(Whew!)  It could have happened to YOU!!!!

{CUT TO EXPENSIVE LOOKING LIVING ROOM, IN WALKS FATTY DRESSED AS A 14 YEAR OLD GIRL CARRYING A LAUNDRY BASKET}

A seedy-looking, depressed young man walks up the stairs.

fatty:  Hi, I was just thinking maybe you wouldn't show up.

jake-in-disguise:  No, sugar, I just had to find a place to park my Big Rig.  Have you ever seen an 18-wheeler up close?

fatty:  Ha ha.  (LOL)  I have to go get some clothes out of the dryer.  I made you some lemonade, make yourself at home.

{EXIT FATTY}

{ENTER CHRIS MATTHEWS}

Chris Matthews:  How are you doing tonight?  What's going on?

jake-in-disguise:  Umm, fine.  Uh, who are you?

I think we all know what happens next...

Was he trying to seduce you? Again?

Please tell me he didn't get into details about wanting to do to you "what daddy does to my little bo...I mean, to me".