One in 20 Scots killed by alcohol.

One in 20 Scots killed by alcohol.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/8126129.stm 

That few? Wonder what the other 19/20 were killed by. My guess is:

1 by alcohol
3 in riots at Old Firm games
3 in North Sea oil accidents
6 from cardiac problems associated with deep fried Mars bars
3 by Loch ness monster attacks
1 by drug overdose after being forced to watch Trainspotting, the world's most over-rated film.
2 out of bitterness about all things English
1 of insanity after one too many references to Andy Murray as a "British" tennis star.

Don't forget Proclaimers Syndrome- a rare condition that makes us over pronounce the letter R, causing vibrations which in turn loosen the skull from the spinal chord.

Krankies disease which affects the balance and makes you fall off pantomime beanstalks.

CJD from all those Desperate Dan cow pies.

Lena Zavaroni disorder: Like Bulemia but comes with a BBC documentary.

Lockerbie Migraine: A headache so severe, it feels as though a Boeing 747 has landed on it.

Lulu: An acute pain in the arse.

Alex Ferguson Face: The result of making a Glasgow salad (chips) while drunk and setting the house on fire.

Add this to all the stabbings, heart attacks and not forgetting that we're still the AIDS capital of Europe. It makes you proud to be a Scot.

fatty.

alcohol killed a Scottish girlfriend of mine,i came home drunk and shot her

[QUOTE]

[b]-fatty- wrote: [/b]

Don't forget Proclaimers Syndrome- a rare condition that makes us over pronounce the letter R, causing vibrations which in turn loosen the skull from the spinal chord.

Krankies disease which affects the balance and makes you fall off pantomime beanstalks.

CJD from all those Desperate Dan cow pies.

Lena Zavaroni disorder: Like Bulemia but comes with a BBC documentary.

Lockerbie Migraine: A headache so severe, it feels as though a Boeing 747 has landed on it.

Lulu: An acute pain in the arse.

Alex Ferguson Face: The result of making a Glasgow salad (chips) while drunk and setting the house on fire.

Add this to all the stabbings, heart attacks and not forgetting that we're still the AIDS capital of Europe. It makes you proud to be a Scot.

fatty.





[/QUOTE]

No clue what half of that means!  Is Scottland really the AIDS capital of Europe?  I thought it would be Eastern Europe.  Interesting. 
I went to Edinburgh once; after looking at the girls there, I'd assume you guys have the lowest birthrates too?

I'm not surprised really, coming from the heart-disease, alcohol drenched West of Scotland it's easy to notice. I wonder if the statistic is even higher in Inverclyde.....

all those Scots that have read the stats and are now abstaining please send all booze to me,all donations are gratefully received

[QUOTE]

[b]Brandon The Great wrote:
[/b]
I went to Edinburgh once; after looking at the girls there, I'd assume you guys have the lowest birthrates too?




[/QUOTE]

Why do you think we drink so much?
Beer goggles are a required addition for Scottish foreplay.

You notice that sober Scot's all wear paper bags.
One over her head to hide her face.
One over my head incase her's slips off.

[QUOTE]

[b]John S Stuart wrote: [/b]

[QUOTE]





[b]Brandon The Great wrote:
[/b]
I went to Edinburgh once; after looking at the girls there, I'd assume you guys have the lowest birthrates too?







[/QUOTE]

Why do you think we drink so much?
Beer goggles are a required addition for Scottish foreplay.

You notice that sober Scot's all wear paper bags.
One over her head to hide her face.
One over my head incase her's slips off.[/QUOTE]
This might also explain why half of Scotland moved to the US as soon as they had the chance back in the 1800s.

[b]ThomasQuinn wrote: [/b]

[QUOTE]

 



[b]John S Stuart wrote: [/b]



 

[QUOTE]

 



 



 



[b]Brandon The Great wrote:
[/b]
I went to Edinburgh once; after looking at the girls there, I'd assume you guys have the lowest birthrates too?




 



 



 

[/QUOTE]

Why do you think we drink so much?
Beer goggles are a required addition for Scottish foreplay.

You notice that sober Scot's all wear paper bags.
One over her head to hide her face.
One over my head incase her's slips off.[/QUOTE]
This might also explain why half of Scotland moved to the US as soon as they had the chance back in the 1800s.


[/QUOTE]
About 100,000 Ulster-Scots moved there between about 1700 and 1770. All into the same house, to save money.

At least we have our lovely weather, noone can take that away from us.

[QUOTE]

[b]Van Basten 9 wrote: [/b]

At least we have our lovely weather, noone can take that away from us.
[/QUOTE]

    Apparently you haven't met Mr. El Nino :-P