PG's tour diary/blog - beware boring stuff

Well, the title warned you, so don't be complaining about content...

I join you from the smart but rather chilly Minneapolis airport, marking time with a smoothie as I wait my connection to Vegas.

11 hours since I left heathrow courtesy of some amalgam of KLM, Northwest & Delta - seriously, guys, sort out your identity crisis.

Haven't flown with any of them before, and to be honest wasn't that impressed. Food was terrible (even by airline standards), attendants were old and unattractive (on other airlines the worst ones are either, not both), and the only possible upside - on demand entertainment content - didn't work, meaning I saw the first 3 minutes of a film. Oh, and touchscreens are a fucking nightmare when the only thing that works is the games and the person behind you is playing Zuma for 3 sodding hours.

I also got the usual (for me) sense of "ok, that's enough, need to get off now" with over 3 hours to go - not a good sign! Immersed myself in vol 2 of Michael Palin's diaries - a nice surprise found at Heathrow having read volume 1 in antigua last year.

Anyway, made it into Minn, queued for hours to clear immigration where I was rather thrown by the pleasant attitude of the officers. Who donated a sense of humour to them? Through to baggage reclaim, then through to baggage drop before joining yet another queue.

In theory this is the queue to have your hand luggage X Rayed. In practice this is a queue behind the cretin who has been living under a rock and doesn't know that "jacket off, shoes off, belt off, keys out" ALL APPLY TO YOU AS WELL! Ticking the "no" box to the moral turpitude question on the Visa form does not excuse you the humiliation of shuffling through in your socks with one hand holding your trousers up.

So, dignity restored, had a browse around the shops, then the food court. Was instantly reminded why I usually put on a stone a week in the US - Charley's Philly House was particularly tempting - all that cheese..mmmm

Well, I say cheese, but obviously it's not - maybe that gives me a way out. Fake cheese = fake calories!

Next stop, Vegas, and the next challenge. Staying awake. You may not think that this should present much of a problem as I'm arriving in LV at 11.30 on saturday night. However, by that point I will already have been awake for 24 hours, so continuing is a bit of a challenge - and one I will have to accept as I can't check in to my hotel until at least 12 hours later.

So, in about 10 hours, if this thread is getting lots of updates that are more boring than the average Tweet, you'll know why...

To be continued, if I can be arsed

Good god, how bad ARE Delta???

I knew they charged for refreshments once it was an internal flight, but to charge 7 dollars a drink and yet not be able to give change from a 10 is stupid. To then turn down the exact payment because it included coin is....not good business at all.

We were warned that LV was going to be a windy arrival, but not the disorganised haste with which we'd be prepared for it. It's not as if you don't see Vegas on the horizon is it? As for the landing itself, the little old lady next to me called it a 'Navy landing', which seemed to fit - low angle, high speed, trash the brakes and tyres (with a worrying degree of wobble).

So, straight through baggage claim, now on to the delights of the Dollar rent-a-car desk.

I hope you have a lot of fun after you survived all the travelling :-) The thing is you do not get anywhere unless you travel. For international flights (OR early morning flights out of London where you routinely spend an hour waiting on the runway in the fog) I recommend sleeping - it's the best you can do to spend time unless you are like me and enjoy staring out of the window for hours. The immigration process in the USA: just pretend to yourself you are entering a police state dictatorship and you can handle the attitude of the staff much better but avoid screaming : "oh no, I'd rather be dead" when they ask you if you want to stay...once you are through you have all the time in the world to enjoy the niceness of the rest of the USA.
If you are still bored watch this video :-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YGc4zOqozo

Bored??? It's 4am local time, i havenn't slept for 30 hours (can't sleep on planes) and everywhere's open!

Anyway, onwards.

Don't rent Dollar. Reasons will follow when I can spare them more time than I already did - most likely in about 5 hours while I'm waiting to exchange the only car they had left for the one I actually RESERVED

Oh dear... I'm sorry.  [img=/images/smiley/msn/sad_smile.gif][/img]   Sounds horrific.
But I was in stitches reading your post, after a few unpleasant flights a while back.  (One of which involved immigration throwing their weight around and pulling me off for questioning!  Not pleasant, esp when someone else was pacing up and down the room saying 'the pilot is waiting, the plane is waiting to take off.' while i filled in an extra form, and my friends sat outside the room quietly wetting themselves.  In times like that it is always helpful to make puppydog eyes and look like you're about to cry, but that may not work for you!)
Anyway, I sincerely hope the rest of Vegas is better then the first few hours!

And Your Valentine, i love the video!!!

Aww P_G I'm so sorry things aren't going your way! My parents are in Lake Tahoe right now and they are expecting snow!! I wish you would have had a layover in Cincinnati! I could have come by and bought you a nice tall glass of piss water (American beer).

Have fun in Vegas!!

Travelling woes are the price to be paid for going somewhere interesting, so I am actually pretty equable about it - when looking back on holidays, it's not the getting there/back that I focus on.

Anyway, must get on with breakfast - Planet Hollywood buffet going very well, although the amount of coffee now required to keep me awake would have a sloth doing the time warp.

Lisser - if only you'd said. What you doing friday? It's not far....

Ok, Dollar - need to slow down my eating by typing.

Didn't expect quick service at 1am, but didn't expect to be there 90 minutes either.

The only real problem was the lack of cars available - only compacts, despite me having booked (and prepaid) for a midsize - fat git that I am. Sorry, sir, but you booked via an agency, so we didn't take your booking into account when organising vehicles. The name of this agency? The UK Dollar website... I understand the nature of franchising, but surely the people using the company name should carry more weight than some random third party referrer?

The upshot was that there was no price reduction for the smaller car, and there were no larger cars to get a free upgrade to. All they could suggest was to take a compact now, then come back in the morning and swap it over for something that will "hopefully have come in by about 8 or 9am". So, once I've finished this delicious, filling, and most likely over-rich (for my uninitiated stomach) breakfast, that's what I'm going to do. We'll see how well they can go about making it right... They'll have their work cut out, judging by the car I have at present - a Caliber so basic there's no electric windows, no central locking, and no way of hiding the suitcase in the back. It looks like a fucking demolition derby car already too - only 40000 miles in.

Grrrrr. Coffee anger being channelled...

Jeez PG.  You should have told us you were coming.  I'd have warned you about the landing AND Dollar Rent-a-Car.  Sorry about the immigration arrivals routine.  I think it's a disgrace and I'm sorry you were subjected to it.

Are you going to go outside of Vegas at all?  There's some interesting stuff to see (Lake Mead, Red Rock Canyon, Valley of fire) that aren't too far away if you're renting a car.  http://parks.nv.gov/vf.htm#HIKES  (Sorry if this is a no brainer, but if you decide to do any hiking and you're by yourself, tell someone you're going, when to expect you back, and take plenty of water;   use sunscreen/sunblock rated at 30 or higher, and remember it can get very cold when the Sun goes down.)

I don't know if you're into the Cirque du Soleil stuff but there are some online discounts here:  http://www.cirquedusoleil.com/lasvegas/en/promotions/index.asp.

Oh, and Roger recommends the wings at Hooters.

Have a great time.    And don't forget the sunscreen/sunblock.

--Cindy

ps:  be prepared for Dollar to try to pull something on you when you return the car. [/QUOTE]

[QUOTE]

[b]Penetration_Guru wrote: [/b]

Travelling woes are the price to be paid for going somewhere interesting, so I am actually pretty equable about it - when looking back on holidays, it's not the getting there/back that I focus on.

 



Anyway, must get on with breakfast - Planet Hollywood buffet going very well, although the amount of coffee now required to keep me awake would have a sloth doing the time warp.



Lisser - if only you'd said. What you doing friday? It's not far....

[/QUOTE]
Are you coming back my way on Friday? I am off work this Friday, Oct. 9th and Monday, the 12th if you are and I'll meet you!! I live about 5 minutes from CVG and can meet you any time!  Let me know!

Hope you eventually get around to having some fun, PG. ;-)

Hello 'stang.....

For those of you unsure, this is a good thing. I love the Mustang, despite it's glaring fault (the trunk lid should include the rear window to make the resultant aperture big enough to actually put anything larger than a water bottle in).

Also, it appears that some of you think I was negative about immigration - I believe I said that it was a lot better this time...

Canyon/hoover/ etc all done previously. Hiking is not gonna happen, neither is dehydration.

Next task is to bribe check in to upgrade me. Then I can switch off for a few hours.

Damn, I can't even bribe a desk clerk... Mind you, tried turning on the charm a little, which was probably a smidgeon ambitious at +36 hours and may have been counterproductive!

Good things about the room - free wifi, good sized bed, ditto TV

Bad things - decor generally, bathroom just appalling. View of the parking garage not a huge concern, but have heard rumours that the noise from there may be unacceptable. Not many channels on TV, but hard to evaluate until some proper content ensues - sunday is either god or football.

Lisser, Lisser, Lisser. There's a yard long margerita here with your name on....but you'll have to come fetch it.

Ahh yes...Sunday is either God or football in the USA but I'm surprised God is in Las Vegas!! :) He usually steers clear of Sin City.

I would love to share a margarita with you My Lord but I can't get out to Vegas, but oh how I wish :(

If you do have a layover on your way back in Cincinnati you'd better let me know!!!! If you fly Delta back there is a good chance of it. Cincinnati is Delta's 2nd largest hub.