Queen Mad Libs

After seeing a picture of an Pig in a magazine, Roger decided they should all go to the zoo. Brian was the first to protest, stating that the last time they all went to the zoo his Jandal turned Magenta. Roger really didn't care about this and told Brian that he shouldn't complain, as he had 18 Chinchillas at home.

Eventually, after much bickering, the band finally arrived at the Large zoo. Freddie's favourite were the Great penguins, which reminded him of the time he and Brian had gone wanking. John prefered the quiet Lop Eared Bunny, known for its Hot feathers and Loud lifespan.

During their trip they met Crystal Taylor, who had turned an interesting shade of Powder Blue after a swim with the Giant Squid. Brian then revealed he had brought a Tin Whistle along with him and took it out and began to sing Won't Get Fooled Again . It was dreadful and Roger kicked Brian in the Wang. It was about this time that a group of approximately 14 rabid and Quick fans ambushed the band. They viciously grabbed Freddie's scarf, nearly choking him in an incident that is Loudly well known today. The other three Queenies were not around, having gone with Crystal for some beer. Poor Freddie was left at the mercy of the Beautiful throng of fans until a then not-so-fat Pheobe came by to save his Queer neck.

When Freddie got back to the hotel, (and the room he shared with John) he got his revenge by putting whipped cream in Brian's Hot Pants.

After a call from Zandra Rhodes, Freddie and the gang headed to meet her in Taihape for a Thermal Sock fitting. Brian, of course, protested, stating that his Scrotum was much too Hairy to look good in one. Freddie was amused by this, until Roger kicked him Noisily. John smoked his Mongolian cigarettes, also making Brian mad.

They finally arrived, after a stop for some Pickled Eels Toenails and chips. They wouldn't have taken so long but Freddie's order was too retarded for his liking and it had to be remade 1.7 times. Roger was wearing a beige jacket, that well complemented his khaki chastity belt. Brian finally convinced John to put out his cigarette, but not before Dan Corson, Freddie's current fling, had arrived and was also smoking. Roger just sat around, waiting to leave so he could go back to Prague and drink rocket fuel.

After a long fitting, the ordeal was finally over and the boys went back to their hotel to play Scrabble. Freddie was in the lead, with .3 points because of a triple word score with 'admiration'. Roger protested quickly that it wasn't a real word, and then everyone made fun of him. He sulked away to the bar, drinking a total of 6 Mai Tais and 19.98 other drinks that he didn't know what they were except that they were green and tasted like dragonfruit.

All was fine, until the next day's fitting when Freddie forced Brian into a arse brown kevlar jumper and Brian kicked him in the left testicle