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I have mono

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L
Admission by default, which is pretty much how most things in my life are undertaken.


MARRY ME!
I
nooooo.

I have poly now.
...this kettle is boiling over... ...one dump...one turd...two tits...John Deacon... ...one prawn...one shrimp...one clam...one chicken!
L
I came down with octo.
I
No you didn't. That was Jude Law. You're not Jude Law. Don't lie, you poisonous snake.
...this kettle is boiling over... ...one dump...one turd...two tits...John Deacon... ...one prawn...one shrimp...one clam...one chicken!
L
This is why we can't have nice things.
I
Actually it's your laser vision...remember that priceless ant painting we had? Hmm? What does he go and do? Mr Flibbles its ass to death.

Goooooooooood going.
...this kettle is boiling over... ...one dump...one turd...two tits...John Deacon... ...one prawn...one shrimp...one clam...one chicken!
L
That ant painting was a disaster from the word 'flidgen', which I corrected you because of your nasty cold that week, when you actually meant to say 'go'. It was hideous next to our davenport, so we moved it into the carport, but it was run over by our Ford Newport, which is a car that I made up from Port Matilda, which is another name I made up after drinking far too much port.
H
hope you feel better :)
Anything too stupid to be said... is sung.
S
get well soon!!!
2+2=5