At school I learned of a previously unknown (to me) phenomenon...:
(The name of the informant has been changed [twice !] for her protection)
Squat the Poople: "This e-mail is so gay..."
Me: " I didn't even know e-mails had sex... !"
Joan Lemon: "Kelley..." (laugh) "You're funny."
Me: "No, seriously, I didn't know that !"
So, now you know. You may want to monitor your young e-mails' after-hour activities. You should make sure to educate them about proper precautions they should take to prevent bringing home any e-mails carring viruses. Make sure to let your e-mails know that "phishing" is not okay, and they should report to a trusted adult if they see any of your new e-mails being pulled off into the darker reccess of the Internet for "initiation".
Seriously, watch out for your e-mails. Your saved draft could be traumatised for life if it's preyed upon by "identity theives" that make the poor thing feel insignificant, submissive, and unimportant. Please be understanding that some of your e-mail, by sheer probability and per-cent counts, will indeed be gay - this mere fact doesn't make them bad e-mails. One thing they share is a propensity for stylised fonts and coloured text. They can be great e-mails just like their non- parts (this is not to say they are perfect, they can be little meanies, too).
Also, please contact your local politicians as sex-education for e-mails is terribly overlooked and underfunded. We can't let this uneducated state continue !
Ah, good ol' google. There is a beer called Oberon, yessir, there is. I am going to name my sherry "Titania", my cranberry cocktail will be "Puck" and then I'll have to remember some more fairy names. Wait - I have a fairy-card-thing over there... Ooo... now I can start a fairy themed bar... ! Or maybe that's been done. Dammit.
