Thoughts on Thor Arnold and Lee Nolan's eleven year friendship with Freddie

To me, NeverTooLate, your message seems to be ambiguous. Could you please clarify?

I don't want to interpret it wrongly.

I second Thor's comment. I'm a bit confused by your post. I can never claim to be important to Ms.Austin but I can't imagine anyone thinking the 3 men who bathed, fed and administered meds to Mr.Mercury were unimportant. Not to mention Jim seemed to be 'the one' for Mr.Mercury. Perhaps that's what bothered her. Who knows. It's one thing for her to dismiss me as I was surely unimportant to her (outside of protecting her and her home) but to dismiss the men who cared for Mr.Mercury at the end of his life? Sorry but knowing her personally or not I don't see much of any explanation for that. I was raised to believe you treat people with kindness. That didn't seem to be Ms.Austin's way. I'll leave it at that. Excuse me if I misinterpreted your comment. Just wanted to clarify..

In Phoebe's second book, he goes a little deeper on the subject of Mary and Freddie's relationship. Phoebe says a big element of it was guilt on Freddie's side. He also says he thinks Mary stuck around so that when Freddie was done "with all that other business" (a direct quote from the book) she would be first in line for him to settle down with. Phoebe also stated that when Barbara Valentin came into the picture, Mary got very demanding of Freddie, since she was no longer the only female friend in Freddie's life and seemed to feel her place may be threatened. Phoebe also corroborates Jim's version of the way things went down after Freddie's death.

I don't mean to be ambiguous.

My interpretation is this: It seems Mary considered Freddie to be important, and to a lesser extent perhaps Jim Beach. It seems she considered Freddie's friends, boyfriend, and employees (specifically Jim, Joe and Phoebe) to be unimportant in her life even though they were important to Freddie.

Hi Shaun , thank you for clarifying what happened at GL. This is documented in Jim's book and phone's , infact Jim mentions you by name and said how awkward you found the situation. It's a shame but there are a portion of fans who refuse to believe this and instead berate Jim. I felt so sad when I finished his book and it did leave me feeling that Freddie would not have been happy to see the changes.I

I'm so glad to hear to remained friends with jim. I also took from the book that Joe was a kind and lovely man. He was loyal to the end . Those three guys loved Freddie .

Interesting things in these few pages. I would ask a few questions.

Thor - How did you conclude that Mary was so important to Freddie? Did he often talk about her in conversation with you while he was in New York? How many times did she visit him there?


SM- I'm glad you decided to say something about it right here on Queenzone forum. Do you know what actually happened before Jim, Joe and Peter were moved from Garden Lodge to Mews? What was the reason?

Thanks.

It was my understanding that Joe lived in the property behind the Garden Lodge before the others moved in there. We were told that it was a legal step taken for the will but Joe also blamed himself for once forgetting to turn on the security system which set Ms.Austin and Mr.Beach off. It's not something either of them really discussed with us. Jim seemed to accept it for what it was but Joe was pretty guilt ridden about it. I think he felt he may have been the cause of the others getting pushed out of the nest as fast as they were. However I highly doubt they were going to be allowed to stay there much longer regardless. All of them seemed hurt by her actions but Jim and Mr.Freestone kept quiet about it in front of her and they certainly never chatted about it with fans to my knowledge. Joe was far more vocal about his feelings. All three seemed to care about Mr.Mercury a great deal. I believe they just all dealt with it in different ways.

Blenkolove I was trying to find some positive in Mary breaking contact with Freddie's parents. Off course I forgot about her living in Garden Lodge.
I saw an interview with Phoebe and Freddie's sister in which she was asked if she has contact with Mary, her reply was a very quick , firm NO.

I believe that Phoebe was living in the Mews prior to Freddie's death. Jim and Joe were, I believe, staying in Garden Lodge.

Also remember reading (unfortunately can't remember where or when) that Mary "ran into" John Reid (I'm pretty sure it was JR, but it MAY have been David Wigg) in London, and during the course of their conversation Mary said something to the effect of look who "won in the end." Gave me chills - not in a good way.

Could it be as simple as Freddie felt guilty for becoming who he Really was while in a relationship with Mary. She knew and supported him before he became famous.....Fame required him to have a 'beard' for business purposes. Mary, willingly went along with it because she Never stopped loving him, and in her mind, he might one day return th Her??? And when he died before he could return to her....in her mind she blames ALL the people Freddie surrounded himself with (who he truly loved and bonded with)???????

blenkolove I totally agree with you.

Be Gentle... it was John Reid that made the comment. Very odd thing to say as she hasn't won at all.

Hello, I don’t speak very well english, sorry. (I’m French).
Mary got the house and money? So, for her, she won. Maybe?

I am new to the forum. I live in France. I really like your exchanges. But I am silent because I speak bad English. Excuse me. I really like Freddie and Queen. Thank you.

Yes she "won" the money and the house, but she lost so much more - no contact with Freddie's friends or family for all these years. Have never been able to figure out her comment that Freddie's friends and the band were jealous of her inheriting so much. Why would the band be jealous?

How could a person who was treated so wonderfully by "the love of my (her) life" ignore his family after he died so tragically.

Want to welcome all the newcomers and thank all the long time contributors to this group. Everyone shares their thoughts and gives of their time so generously. Thor you really started something great, and now that we've gotten rid of the trolls and nastiness it's a pleasure (and a MUST) to visit every day.

Thanks to all.

Hi junealloway,

Welcome and don't be shy. Perfect English is not a requirement for participation.

It is saddening to read about how Mary behaved towards Jim, Joe, and Phoebe after Freddie's death. In his blog, Phoebe wrote that the last time he saw Mary was in 2003. He happened to be in her neighborhood and rang her doorbell on a lark. She invited him in for tea and they chatted for three hours. Delilah even joined them on the sofa. He said they reminisced about the old days and caught each other up on their current situations. I think Mary's marriage had just recently fallen apart. In any case, it seemed that any hurt feelings or rancor had passed by then.

Phoebe also said that before Freddie died he was fond of Mary and admired her loyalty to him. So, when she initially asked him to stay on at Garden Lodge as her personal assistant, he said yes. I'm not sure why she eventually decided she would not need him.

Like Joe and Jim, Phoebe also mentioned that Mary did not know the REAL Freddie. I'm guessing he censored his language and bawdy humor around her. He did the same with his family. It was with his gay men friends that he could let down his hair.

Phoebe said that he stayed in touch with Jim after he returned to Ireland and talked on the phone with him about once a month. Apparently Phoebe and Jim worked together at Selfridges years before Jim and Freddie met in a bar. Small world indeed.