clarification of Thor Arnold's role in Freddie's life

Hey Villiers,
Very interesting and intuitive question. As a matter of fact,
I just found out about a month ago that Lee IS still in touch
with Peter. How did you know? I now have Peter's address
and I hope to reconnect with him soon. I would rather text,
but not even Lee has his personal phone number. That is
uncanny if you just came up with this thought, or did you
read it somewhere. Since Lee has just left LA for Palm Springs
and by chance lives 1 block away from Brandon (who is still
a lifelong friend) and actually is going to spend every summer
in San Diego at the condo we bought together in 1991. When
we were young and good looking we used to joke about probably
winding up back together as OLD FOOLS...well it comes true
next June.

Lol sounds like a blast. Can you imagine living it up in Palm Springs with friends in your more mature years (you ain't old!) like The Golden Girls lol.

Btw I sent you a private message to answer your question

@ Villiers

I was only referring to that 1987 interview I referenced where I didn't hear Freddie say he had found love. Of course, just because he does not proclaim it doesn't mean he wasn't in love with Jim. He also said in the same interview "I have lived a full life and if I am dead tomorrow, I don't give a damn." Love has a way of infusing you with new life and possibilities. It makes you look forward to tomorrow....It makes you seen the world in color. I did not get that sense from Freddie in that interview, but I truly hope I am wrong. I do believe Jim was a great comfort to Freddie, a rock, and there is certainly love in that.

Thor,

So....I know you had your own place in The Village, but did Freddie ever let you or other friends crash at his apartment when he was away on tour? "Here's the key to my place...have fun while I am gone"!

Yikes, Rainbow
"He also said in the same interview "I have lived a full life and if I am dead tomorrow, I don't give a damn." Love has a way of infusing you with new life and possibilities. It makes you look forward to tomorrow....It makes you seen the world in color. I did not get that sense from Freddie in that interview, but I truly hope I am wrong"

When Freddie said he wouldn't care if he lived to 70 or not "if I die tomorrow, I dont give a damn", (Wigg interview 87) he was already aware that he was dying. It had nothing to do with Jim or his love making him want to live. He knew he wasnt going to live. Poor guy was just trying to keep a brave face on and handle it with grace.

Jim talked about he and freddie breaking down crying together over everything. Freddie told him he knew what was going to happen to him, and he was very emotional. Id say thats a man who did find something in life to live for (and among other things, Jims love could very well be one of the reasons). And seeing as Freddie never spoke about his lovers to reporters, but he did tell David Wigg that with Jim he found the niche hed always been looking for and "no fucker in this universe is going to upset it", I think its safe to assume he did find love in Jim.

HaHaRainbow61,
No that would have been unnecessary, We all had our own apartments.
We had no interest in staying there if Freddie was not present. I wish I
owned that place...it was a phenomenal. apartment!...LOL

@ Villiers

Point taken....Thanks for your perspective. I do think Freddie handled his situation with grace. I truly admire him for that.

" Love has a way of infusing you with new life and possibilities. It makes you look forward to tomorrow....It makes you seen the world in color."

It certainly does...especially when you are young. From what I have read, that type of blinding "love" was something experienced time and again but it always ended in heartbreak and failure. "Love" and what that means can change when you get older. I'm a middle-aged)48) straight man and I know what I cherish in a relationship today is different than what I did in my 20's or 30's.

I really am heartened by Thor's account of his relationship with Freddie, Freddie's continued strong friendship with former lovers(Joe) and Thor's revelation about Brandon and how they are still lifelong friends. It is it more common in the gay community for this "strong friendship after love has died" because I have to admit that it's slightly foreign to me an *my* life experience.

I hope I'm not flamed or put on blast for this question by anybody because I am genuinely curious.

Rainbow, very true. He faced it with bravery and grace. Very inspiring.

The guy liked music sex and drugs. in other words Rock and Roll.
He wrote major hits and fucked around along the way.

the end

Hey PrimeJiveUSA,
I'm sure this happens in the straight world as well, but I don't know for sure.
Besides Brandon, before I ever met him, I had a 2 year relationship with
Joe Scardilli, one of the 4 new NY friends of Freddie. When we first broke
up, I was heartbroken, and probably stewed for about a year. But after that,
all the things I enjoyed about him as a boyfriend were still there. Our love
died (his love first) but I moved on and we became good friends. The same with
Brandon after 7 years together and a little time away, we also became good
friends and left all the nastiness behind. I do not know, but perhaps women
can not leave things behind. I believe they may be much more unforgiving if
they are ever cheated on. That seems to be a clear break-up thing with no
chance for reconciliation. OK...time for the ladies here to add their thoughts
on this subject. I may be completely wrong about this...please enlighten me.

@Shvili

You must be fun at parties lol. Nope. There was much more to the man than his writing hits and fucking. He had relationships and love. Friends and much more. This thread is great because we can discuss all that.

Oh Shvili,
A person can not be judged by what he "likes." I've tried to make
this point several times. He was SO much more than "music, sex,
and drugs" He was a very genuine human being with empathy for
others outside of family and spouses, generosity and genius.
Please reconsider. I don't know if the same could be said for
Paul McCartney or Mick Jagger or Eric Clapton to name a few, but
if you can show evidence of this in other rock stars...please set
me straight (no pun intended...lol)

thundergod wrote:
OK...time for the ladies here to add their thoughts
on this subject. I may be completely wrong about this...please enlighten me.

I am friends, best friends, with my ex-partner. We haven't been in a relationship with each other for 15 years, and will never be again.

Neither of us are 'traditional' people though in the sense that neither of us were ever looking for marriage and children. We embraced alternative lifestyles. So perhaps we were immune to the idea that you don't stay in contact with your ex.

His main return to my life was when he heard I was bereaved. He'd lost many people himself and he just turned up on my doorstep and took over. But we are much happier as friends and will never be anything more than that now.

Thor, on the subject of Freddie's apartment which you loved...did Freddie ever comment on your own apartment, or make suggestions about it, when he visited?

I'm imagining the artist in him would have been at work in all environments and not just in his palatial homes, lol (and I'm sure your apartment was lovely!)

Thank you so much SmokyQuartz for your input on this subject.
I say...Good for the two of you!...very refreshing to hear. Maybe
you can give some pointers to our friend PrimeJive USA, it seems
he's not finding his way to friendship with ex's like we have.