I was taking my 4 year old daughter, Leigh to nursery one day when she looked up at the sky and said 'Daddy, what are those white fluffy things in the sky?'
'Those are clouds sweetheart,' I replied.
'What are they made of?'
'They're made of water my wee angel'
'How do they get up there?'
'Well the sun dries up the rain and it turns into steam and floats up into the sky.'
'And do they stay up there Daddy?'
'No darling, they eventually turn back into water and fall back to earth.'
'Then what happens?'
'Then the whole thing starts all over again.'
'But Daddy what happens whe....'
' Oh why don't you fuck off and bug your mum for a change you annoying little shite. Jesus christ, is it any wonder I'm going bald!'
Kids eh?
fatty.
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Posts in chronological order
Named after our very own Eggy, perchance? ;-)
LOL, FATTY!
"Cole: But I want to go outside! It's sunny out, Manda...plllleeeeeaaaassseee!
Me: Cole, we just came inside and now I need to do the chores.
Cole: But Trisha always lets us go outside!
Me: Cole, I said no.
Cole: You're mean! I'm never coming back here!
Various other kid: Yeah, right, Cole - you'll be back tomorrow!"
LOL! :-)
Me: Cole, we just came inside and now I need to do the chores.
Cole: But Trisha always lets us go outside!
Me: Cole, I said no.
Cole: You're mean! I'm never coming back here!
Various other kid: Yeah, right, Cole - you'll be back tomorrow!"
LOL! :-)
I have a few more convos that I will put up, but they will be the last until I have some more - I can only remember so much!
Cole: Let me take out the trash today.
Me: Not today. It is too cold out for me to let you take the trash out, Cole.
Cole: But I just got my coat on, so I could take it out! Please, Manda...this is my special job.
Me: Cole, I said you can't, so you may as well go and play now.
Cole: I'm mad at you! *cough*
Me: What was that! Did you just cough?? Oh, now I'm REALLY not letting you go out.
Cole: No, I didn't cough! I didn't!
Me: *laughs* Mm-hmmmmm..don't try telling me tales, boy.
(notice yet that Cole is almost always complaining? I wish I were exaggerating his conversations - LOL)
Krista: Hey! Hat and cat rhyme, don't they?!
Me: yes, they do - good job!
Krista: *thinks a moment*...hey, James and James rhyme, don't they?!
Me: hmmmmm...no..how about we try James and games?
Krista: *thinks*...yeah! that one rhymes too!
Me: *tries putting up a gate, so the door can be open, without the kids going outside...but is getting frustrated, because she doesn't know how to make it stay locked*
Cole: Okay, now you push this thing down...yeah, do that. No! you're doing it wrong!
Me: Well, Cole, I don't know how to put it up, cos I've never done it.
Cole: Now what are you doing?
Me: what are you doing! *laughs* you said this is how you're supposed to do it. *tries again*
Mariah: *claps* go, Manda, go!
Me: *looks and laughs at Mariah, as she doesn't know why she is cheering*
Mariah: *grins at Manda*
Cole: Let me take out the trash today.
Me: Not today. It is too cold out for me to let you take the trash out, Cole.
Cole: But I just got my coat on, so I could take it out! Please, Manda...this is my special job.
Me: Cole, I said you can't, so you may as well go and play now.
Cole: I'm mad at you! *cough*
Me: What was that! Did you just cough?? Oh, now I'm REALLY not letting you go out.
Cole: No, I didn't cough! I didn't!
Me: *laughs* Mm-hmmmmm..don't try telling me tales, boy.
(notice yet that Cole is almost always complaining? I wish I were exaggerating his conversations - LOL)
Krista: Hey! Hat and cat rhyme, don't they?!
Me: yes, they do - good job!
Krista: *thinks a moment*...hey, James and James rhyme, don't they?!
Me: hmmmmm...no..how about we try James and games?
Krista: *thinks*...yeah! that one rhymes too!
Me: *tries putting up a gate, so the door can be open, without the kids going outside...but is getting frustrated, because she doesn't know how to make it stay locked*
Cole: Okay, now you push this thing down...yeah, do that. No! you're doing it wrong!
Me: Well, Cole, I don't know how to put it up, cos I've never done it.
Cole: Now what are you doing?
Me: what are you doing! *laughs* you said this is how you're supposed to do it. *tries again*
Mariah: *claps* go, Manda, go!
Me: *looks and laughs at Mariah, as she doesn't know why she is cheering*
Mariah: *grins at Manda*
lol @ "re-pregnant" & fatty!
LOL! Great stuff Manda! :D That little Cole... :p
At my flat when I was looking after my nephew one evening:
Stephen: Uncle Bob, can I use your computer?
Me: How would you like 8 broken fingers?
Stephen: What's on tv tonight?
Stephen: Uncle Bob, can I use your computer?
Me: How would you like 8 broken fingers?
Stephen: What's on tv tonight?
LOL! Funny Bob! :D
That's about as funny as the playstation story, Bob. ;^D
I overheard Stephen's sister telling him that he was in trouble at school for winding up the older lads and that he could expect a thumping the following day. I told Kerry to tell her school friends that if Stephen got a thump then I would be down the school and I would belt every single kid until I got the right one. She informed me that the teachers would never let me get away with it - I informed her that I would hit them too for allowing older boys to pick on him, especially as he was a lot smaller than everyone else (he has sprouted up since then). Finally she said 'What if it was me?' - I replied 'I would hit you the fucking hardest because you should know better!'
I love being an Uncle :-D
I love being an Uncle :-D
Oh, Paul...
I'm not that intolerable...am I?
Don't answer that.
I'm not that intolerable...am I?
Don't answer that.
Thought you all may find this humorous....
Cole: Can I mop?
Me: No.
Cole: Aw! No fair. Why can't I?
Me: Because I am the only one who does the chores - not you kids.
Cole: *walks away and mumbles "jerk" under his breath*
Me: What was that?!
Cole: I said "TREE!"
Me: You said "tree"?
Cole: Yes!
Me: Why would you say tree? I heard what you said, you called me a jerk.
Cole: Did not!
Me: Cole, I heard you.
Cole: You're mean!
Me: Yeah, I am. In fact, I'm mean enough to write a note to Trisha about your bad attitude.
Cole: Can I mop?
Me: No.
Cole: Aw! No fair. Why can't I?
Me: Because I am the only one who does the chores - not you kids.
Cole: *walks away and mumbles "jerk" under his breath*
Me: What was that?!
Cole: I said "TREE!"
Me: You said "tree"?
Cole: Yes!
Me: Why would you say tree? I heard what you said, you called me a jerk.
Cole: Did not!
Me: Cole, I heard you.
Cole: You're mean!
Me: Yeah, I am. In fact, I'm mean enough to write a note to Trisha about your bad attitude.
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You know my mom tells me that whe nI was 3 I was sitting at the table with this neighbor boy and we kept saying "That thing" like we thought it was the funniest thing ever and she has no idea what we were talking about.......hmmm......weell I know I was just 3 but I also know what I would be talknig about if that was now....... sorry I just couldn't resist adding that.... nice forum change by the way!