Conversations with Kiddies

At my flat when I was looking after my nephew one evening:

Stephen: Uncle Bob, can I use your computer?
Me: How would you like 8 broken fingers?
Stephen: What's on tv tonight?

LOL! Funny Bob! :D

I overheard Stephen's sister telling him that he was in trouble at school for winding up the older lads and that he could expect a thumping the following day. I told Kerry to tell her school friends that if Stephen got a thump then I would be down the school and I would belt every single kid until I got the right one. She informed me that the teachers would never let me get away with it - I informed her that I would hit them too for allowing older boys to pick on him, especially as he was a lot smaller than everyone else (he has sprouted up since then). Finally she said 'What if it was me?' - I replied 'I would hit you the fucking hardest because you should know better!'

I love being an Uncle :-D

Oh, Paul...

I'm not that intolerable...am I?

Don't answer that.

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You know my mom tells me that whe nI was 3 I was sitting at the table with this neighbor boy and we kept saying &quot;That thing&quot; like we thought it was the funniest thing ever and she has no idea what we were talking about.......hmmm......weell I know I was just 3 but I also know what I would be talknig about if that was now....... sorry I just couldn't resist adding that.... nice forum change by the way!

I know I'm coming late to this thread, but these are some incredibly hilarious conversations! I love little kids-- they just say whatever's on their mind and they're so honest!

Once, I was babysitting these two adorable girls, Sydney and Payton, and I was reading them a story. There was a horse on the page and I had to make a horse sound, so I did.

Sydney: That was really creepy, Erica.

I could NOT stop laughing!

Well since i work with children in my place (a family theme pub) sadly ive been put off them for life. You do get the occasional baby whos cute, but the rest...

child: i want a balloon
me: what colour
child:red
me: theres no red ones today, sorry
child: BUT I WANT ONE!
Parents says nothing about child screaming
I have to go search for red ones.
Child: i want three like hes got

then you hear...

child: i want ice cream mummie
mum: ok, but only after your chips
child: (cries and screams) I WANT IT NOOOW!
mum: eat another chip
child: NOOOOOO!
parent ignores and allows child to misbehave

time for the child to go...

parent: time to go home now, you can have some sweeties at home
child: (throws tantrum screaming so loudly that other customers exchange horrified glances)
parent: (picks child up, sometimes by crazy angle and carries it out kicking and screaming until it turns red)

Sometimes you get some with manners, but sadly id say only one in five knows how to say please and thankyou, and worse, neither do the parents. But boy do they know how to complain!