The Queenzone Personal Board Soap Opera

...give him back the half ounce of Coke he left in Michael Jackson's bathroom.

Meanwhile, Flashman had concocted yet another plan to....

...Cappuccino, which launced poor Flashy into a new fit of throwing up on the floor. Somewhere, behind the black curtains of the pub, the Soap Serial's manager was having a deep think. It occured to him that the serial was being split into too many smaller stories, none of them being completed. At the next episode he added a resume, and hoped it would somehow turn out OK in the end:

Resume.
FGT is missing, kidnapped.
Baer is locked up in a closet, probably getting hungry by now.
Flashman is trying to sober up.
The rest of the pub-members are seeing Brian May, who is ignoring them in order to beat up John Deacon.

Having said that, the new episode started with a scene involving...

...a tuna fish sandwich, which John Deacon had been carrying in his wallet for 3 days. In the midst of his pummelling, Deaky had the forethought to fall into the closet door, shattering it into pieces. Baer, having chained himself to the boiler, exclaimed "P o 0 o 0 O o", at which time John presented him with the sandwich.

Upon seeing this turn of events, Brian shouted ".....

"I can't believe it's not butter!" And Charlton Heston entered the room, stoned on acid and loudly singing "We'll Meet Again" by Vera Lynn.

And in popped Richard (Inu Yasha), who so happened to hate Charton Heston, and Richard proceeded to beating the stoned crap out of Heston until he (Heston)...

... passed out and changed into a psychotic hamster named Harold Dimby Watthis Bingly Batt Charles Conrad Bart Likby Seventeen and One Third Junior.

Richard then proceeded to feed the psychotic hamster poisoned lettuce. As soon as the hamster ate the lettuce, he gagged and flipped onto his back, twiched his legs a little, and died.

With that, Brian came and said...

"Yee haw! I've been a hankerin' for some chiiiiicken!"

At this moment Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band fell through the window.

"That's not SPLHCB!" Richard exclaimed.
He proceeded to pull off the mask off "John's" face to reveal...

roger taylor dressed in the outfit from iwtbf

"Who smells like ass??"

And then Charles...

..proceeded to soil himself with a mixture of Green Apple Splatters caused by the tuna sandwich, and Weenis juice.

John, still reeling form the beating, looked at Roger and said "...