CHAPTER 1
"Goddamned mice," thought Stella as she stood shaking on the chair in her messy kitchen. SNAP! and then another SNAP! Two down, and how many to go?
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After bludgeoning all the mice to death with her blunt knife, she decided on cooking a fine stew. Plopping each mouse's mangled little body into her slow cooker, she set about collecting some vegetables.
As she went out to the vegetable garden, she spotted a strange looking fellow, on his knees, burrowing feverishly in the turnips.
"Who are you, and what do you think you are doing?", cried Stella.
"Who are you, and what do you think you are doing?", cried Stella.
'oh i'm sorry' said the man, 'i was just looking for my bass guitar, my friends hid it you see, my name's John'
Stella returned to her house with her turnips. She looked into the slowcooker and checked on the status of the simmering mice. Grease was popping and bubbling everywhere, and Stella decided that she should take the mice off the burner. She mixed them with diced turnips and sat down to eat, listening to to slipknot and reading Uncut magazine. The doorbell rang and it was John again.
oh sorry that was 5 sentences. :P
".... 25 bean burritos. Oh, what is that other lovely smell?" said John.
"It is mouse-turnip stew from Peter Freestone's cookbook 'Cooking For A Legend,' " said Stella. "Would you like some?"
"It is mouse-turnip stew from Peter Freestone's cookbook 'Cooking For A Legend,' " said Stella. "Would you like some?"
"I'm sorry, but turnips give me gas," John said.
"Oh, but you must have some! I can't eat it all by myself!" Stella said. "What's a little gas?"
"You don't know my farts," John said, "The air turns green and i kill every living thing around me......."
"Oh, but you must have some! I can't eat it all by myself!" Stella said. "What's a little gas?"
"You don't know my farts," John said, "The air turns green and i kill every living thing around me......."
She looked down to see instead of hands, he had several tropical fruits stuck on spoons...
Just then there was another knock at the door, it was none other than ...
he had a stroke and died there and then.
Then suddenly the Super Gecko came (da da-da-da) and set fire to Bryans Permed Pants. He dropped the torch, set flight and ran into...
a turkey, on the run so he wouldn't become Thanksgiving dinner. The turkey was accompanied by...
...none other than Pikachu, who was also running, trying to desperately escape his contract from Nintendo.
The turkey said...
The turkey said...
"Stella!"